GT: That boorish cur!!! TT: Yes, that's exactly the phrase I would use to describe someone responsible for the extermination of five billion people. TT: It was just so uncivilized of him. GT: How could such an atrocity be allowed to happen? GT: Was his personal magnetism really that overwhelming? TT: Maybe overwhelming in the wrong direction, yeah. TT: But it didn't happen overnight. It was a gradual decline in the integrity of the system that allowed it. TT: Eventually the wheels came off and the political scene mirrored the absurdity of the media circus. TT: By the time Presidents Jay and Dope were elected, western civilization had officially fucked itself over forever, and I think everyone knew it. GT: Oh no. GT: When does that happen? TT: 2024. The last free election the world would ever see. GT: So like... GT: They were on the ticket together? As president and vice president? TT: No, man. TT: They were both president. TT: They were the first Dual-Presidents of the United States of America. Also the last. TT: They were also the first and last juggalo presidents. The founding fathers warned us about this, but nobody listened. GT: They did? Warned us about what exactly? TT: The Mirthful Executives. TT: George Washington had prophetic nightmares about them. He tried to warn people, and get language amended to the constitution to prevent it. TT: Like forbidding the election of what he famously described as "a pair of salty bards," or "unruly jesters given to the sweet drink." TT: But everyone just thought he toked too hard on the colonial cannabis or whatever. GT: Im not sure i follow. These are like clown presidents or such? TT: Yes. They were a shitty rap duo from your time. TT: But they ran a hell of a campaign. By then the juggalo party had gotten huge. While the numerous other candidates split the moderate vote, they retained a very energized and devoted base. TT: You could say their party had a big tent. GT: Dirk i really dislike the future you are describing. TT: Hey me too. TT: They were swept into office on a wave of Faygo, and the presidential inauguration was the biggest Gathering of the Juggalos of all time. TT: They all hosed each other down on the Whitehouse lawn with shitty soda. The "D.C." in the capital thereafter officially stood for "Dark Carnival." TT: Of course their campaign was helped considerably by having support from the Baroness. TT: In retrospect, people developed the impression that it was all a part of her sick sense of humor. TT: There was this sense that she just loved the idea of delegating the extreme subjugation of the world's population to a pair of demented clown rappers. TT: Some have speculated this was just another way she was attempting to resurrect her previous model of governance, though this seems kinda far fetched to me. TT: Who the fuck ever heard of an alien juggalo? To me this is about as stupid as the crackpot theories get.