ARQUIUSPRITE: But why, lord bro ARQUIUSPRITE: I was just about to pony up the boob fa% ARQUIUSPRITE: There is a 100% probability that you would have been thrilled to hear my e%egesis on troll knockers DIRK: It might have been an interesting subject to talk about another time, with a different person. DIRK: But that's not now, and it sure isn't with you. ARQUIUSPRITE: Dude, that is ice cold ARQUIUSPRITE: I would be hurt, if I were not a flawless machine fused with haughty nobility ARQUIUSPRITE: If you don't wish to hear my epic monodialogue on alien bazongas ARQUIUSPRITE: I'm not sure what else I can do to entertain you ARQUIUSPRITE: You are seriously hoofcuffing my material here ARQUIUSPRITE: Pretty demanding, if you ask me ARQUIUSPRITE: But as your mystical guide, I suppose it is my duty to manufacture small talk, if that's what you really want ARQUIUSPRITE: What about fine art? We could talk about that ARQUIUSPRITE: Dirk, did you know the sweaty troll guy who I used to be, and still kind of am, used to adore fine art? ARQUIUSPRITE: He was just like you and me, in that sense ARQUIUSPRITE: It seems I have a lot in common with myself ARQUIUSPRITE: If you can ever manage to get over yourself, I would highly recommend being me ARQUIUSPRITE: Or at least something like me ARQUIUSPRITE: Maybe somewhere, there is a dead troll out there, just waiting for you to merge with him DIRK: I wasn't asking you to make small talk, or to hear about all the ways you've managed to shit around wasting time. DIRK: Believe it or not, I was hoping you would describe the tactical situation there. ARQUIUSPRITE: Sounds boring ARQUIUSPRITE: Are you sure you don't want to talk about paintings of big naked horse monsters and such? DIRK: Yes, you got me. DIRK: I would love to have a long talk about horse nudes and xenobreasts with you. DIRK: Unfortunately I'm wearing pantaloons and flying through the middle of goddamn nowhere. ARQUIUSPRITE: Pantaloons you say DIRK: Pant a fucking loons. ARQUIUSPRITE: Sir, are you implying that you are not dressed appropriately for a discussion of high culture ARQUIUSPRITE: Because it seems to me that you could not be dressed more appropriately if you tried DIRK: I respectfully disagree. ARQUIUSPRITE: Where are you? DIRK: I don't know. Way out in space. DIRK: I'm flying back there now. ARQUIUSPRITE: How long do you suppose it will take you to get back? DIRK: I'm not sure. DIRK: A pretty good while. ARQUIUSPRITE: Never mind. I have triangulated your location and velocity using long range sensor technology, and probably also some sprite magic DIRK: You did? ARQUIUSPRITE: Hey Dirk ARQUIUSPRITE: Remember how whenever I dubiously claimed to have triangulated something, it was always this great play on words? DIRK: Not really. ARQUIUSPRITE: Because I was just a pair of triangles ARQUIUSPRITE: But not anymore DIRK: I know. ARQUIUSPRITE: Because I have this rockin' new torso DIRK: Cool. DIRK: How long do your calculations say it will take me to get back? ARQUIUSPRITE: E%actly a little more than three hours DIRK: Damn it. ARQUIUSPRITE: Additional sweeps from my STRONGLASERS are telling me there are a few other people on the periphery of the session closing in at a similar rate DIRK: Who? ARQUIUSPRITE: Just some dudes ARQUIUSPRITE: What are you doing all the way out there and wearing pantaloons, by the way DIRK: Let's not talk about the pantaloons anymore. DIRK: Roxy and I became god tiers, but I don't remember exactly how. DIRK: Then I saw the Batterwitch. DIRK: So I charged her with my sword, so as to ruin her shit. DIRK: That's when some crazy wolf girl appeared and punched me in the face. DIRK: Then I think she teleported me out here. ARQUIUSPRITE: That was evil Jade DIRK: Evil Jade?? ARQUIUSPRITE: Yes DIRK: You mean Jake's grandmother. ARQUIUSPRITE: Yes DIRK: She's evil too? ARQUIUSPRITE: Yes DIRK: Is anyone there NOT evil? ARQUIUSPRITE: Yes DIRK: Yes what? ARQUIUSPRITE: Yes anyone here is not evil ARQUIUSPRITE: That is to say, there e%ist people here who are not evil ARQUIUSPRITE: Such as Dave ARQUIUSPRITE: Dave is not evil, to my knowledge DIRK: Dave???