TT: Bro. TT: What are you doing. TT: It seems you are zoning out again. TT: What happened to all these actual responsibilities you were going to take seriously? TT: I was thinking about what to do. TT: Strategizing. Factoring contingencies. You know how it is. TT: It seems to me you were dwelling within your dream awareness at the expense of your waking business again. TT: I don't think you're as awesome a multi-tasker as you like to think. You know you kind of zombie the fuck out on this side when you get all contemplative on that side. TT: Appearances are deceptive. TT: I'm still in control here. Just doing this human thing we call "chilling out for half a goddamn minute." TT: I say y'all are overestimating your mind's capability to run shit in parallel. TT: What do you think you are? A machine? TT: No dude. TT: I already deployed a variety of mechanical avatars dedicated to that self-aggrandizing fantasy. TT: You have the incredible privilege of getting to be one of them. TT: That's right. I am a machine, and therefore I can keep like billions of calculations or whatever all humming away at once. TT: I tackle shit in background processes that you could only dream of wrapping your exquisite looking head around, even on a great hair day. TT: You know pi? TT: What, you mean the number? TT: Yes, the number. The big circle number, genius. TT: I knew you meant the fucking number, my question was a joke. TT: I know your question was a joke, my response was a joke. TT: Yeah, I know that. I'm practically you, dumbass. All these things we're saying are jokes, including this fuckin' useless clarification. TT: What about pi? TT: Yeah, the thing is, I solved it. TT: What do you mean you solved it? TT: I mean that's what a hotshot I am. I fuckin' solved it. TT: Like, calculated it so much, I got to the end. TT: Bullshit. TT: You wish it was bullshit. The last number is 4. Read it and fucking weep. TT: It's not 4 you jackass, it's fucking nothing. There is no end. TT: Said the smug organic matter with a lifespan. TT: Look, I know you're just fucking with me because for some reason I decided to program my own personal troll three years ago, but this shit was proven. TT: Actually demonstrated with unassailable mathematics, like a long ass time ago. TT: Well, I just assailed it. It wasn't even that hard. TT: Like I just kept hacking those digits so furiously with my sick 'rithms, the whole goddamn number just cried uncle. TT: I kind of wore it out, and it just gave up. Sort of like I overloaded the system. TT: You know like in the old movie when Ferris Bueller got the nuclear computer to play tic-tac-toe against itself so hard, it blew up? TT: This is laughable. It's a totally elementary thing. I'm pretty sure an ancient Greek guy settled shit about irrational numbers. It was practically when math was invented. TT: Sure, it was settled, and then some roboshades came along and owned that fucker posthumously. TT: I also figured out all the prime numbers too. TT: No, not having this conversation. TT: Did it while we were talking just now. Got to the end. TT: And you know what? The last one isn't even that big. Kinda dissapointed, to be honest. TT: What is even a prime number? TT: Are they the, like... really, really choice ones? The sweetest numbers? TT: You lost me, supercomputer. TT: This is what I'm saying. I put your ability to keep plates spinnin' on sticks to insane amounts of shame. TT: I don't even sleep. TT: Neither do I. TT: I know that, that was the fucking joke. TT: Holy shit, turns out joking was the basis for my response too. TT: Aren't these ironic "you don't get the joke" conversations we have always just so awesome? <- A joke. TT: Ha ha, nice one. TT: Anyway, all I'm saying is you can leave some of the heavy lifting to me now and then. TT: I'll keep that in mind. TT: In the meantime, I have to contact Jane and warn her Roxy might try to pull that pointless stunt. TT: So, thanks for snapping me out of my daydream so I could do that, I guess? TT: Looks like you're pulling your weight already. TT: See? Maybe that was my whole point in having this conversation. TT: Your point was to fuck with me, like it usually is. TT: My point was to point out you've got multi-self management issues, dude. TT: Jugglin' too many selves for being not-software. TT: My point was also to fuck with you. TT: Also, TT: My point was to ask, TT: Are you really going to go through with it today? TT: What? TT: The Jake thing. TT: Oh god. TT: Will you just, TT: Hold on. TT: Let me deal with the Jane thing first.