JADE: remember how you told me how karkat kept sort of trying to set you up with rose? JOHN: yes. JADE: you told me this on more than one occasion if i recall! JOHN: what is your point! JADE: well, i have kind of wondered to myself if you kept bringing that up because on some level you wanted that to be true... JOHN: oh man. JOHN: jade, listen. JOHN: at this point i could not give less of a rat's ass about romancey stuff! JOHN: i would rather just play some games, and chill out for several years on this magical flying boat. is that too much to ask? JADE: not at all! that is perfectly fine JOHN: when i catch up with our buddies, i'm sure i will give rose a nice, FRIENDLY hug. JADE: aww JOHN: whereas i will offer dave a tender bro embrace, and shove karkat down a flight of friendship stairs. JADE: heheheheh JOHN: but that is IT. JOHN: it's all very complicated and bothersome, jade. JADE: what? JOHN: you know. matters of the heart. JADE: *snicker* JOHN: ok, you may laugh at my choice of words, but it is true. JOHN: it's really befuddling and distracting when you are on a major quest to make universes out of frogs. who even needs it? JADE: i guess you have a point JOHN: like... JOHN: you remember that troll girl who was sort of into me? JADE: mm hm JOHN: well, ok. JOHN: that seemed like a pretty big deal at the time! JOHN: it really seemed like she liked me, but also, she was *probably* insane? JOHN: like, i mean, in a trollish, murderous kind of way. JADE: yikes JOHN: but craziness notwithstanding, i didn't really know what to think. JOHN: i guess i thought she was cool at the time. i was honestly kind of flummoxed about it. JOHN: but the point is, when all was said and done, that was just some stuff that happened over one day, which was a whole year ago already. JOHN: i barely even remember what we talked about. by the time we meet up, she probably won't give a shit about me at all. JOHN: which, let's face it, is probably for the best. JADE: ..... JOHN: i think we make things more meaningful in our head when they're happening than they really are. like realistically? there were probably a lot of things that went on that day that didn't mean that much. JOHN: like remember how you said you thought karkat was getting this silly angry crush on you? JADE: that was just my hunch JOHN: yeah. JOHN: i mean, do you really think after three years he is still going to have the rage hots for you? JADE: i sincerely doubt it JADE: at least JADE: i hope not ._. JOHN: i don't think even he is that crazy. JOHN: anyway, my point is, who even cares about all that? JOHN: romance and dating are dumb and boring. we are legendary heroes, and we have bigger fish to fry. like that smug fatass over there on the horizon. JOHN: he sure looks pleased with himself. just look at him, he thinks he is the undisputed king of that mountain or something. JADE: that is so outrageous JOHN: follow me so we can seize the high ground against this hideous ocean dwelling marshmallow man, and steal all of his treasure. JADE: after you!